“Addiction hates community,” my friend told me.
I hadn’t seen or talked to him in years. He isn’t in recovery, but had walked with a family member through their addiction and recovery. He saw how she suffered and his heart broke with every false start or failed attempt at recovery. Then he saw her heal.
The healing came when she integrated herself into a community of people who were trudging the same road. To her it was new, but to her new friends it was familiar. They knew the twists and turns of the path, along with every pothole and danger spot. They told her that no matter how far down the road she went, the distance to the ditch was always the same, but they’d always be there to help her stay on the path.
Community relieves the shame for addicts and alcoholics. An old AA bromide says, “A meeting is the only place you can get together with strangers and reminisce.” It gives us the hope that, despite believing to the point of certainty that we are the only ones who have suffered like this, there are others who know the way. More importantly, they are willing to walk with us. Their story started just like ours and they can help us write a different ending.
When that truth sets in, addiction simply cannot survive. When we find that community addiction hates it, because it knows it has lost its grip on us.
Delta has incredible therapists and professionals that employ cutting edge treatment modalities. We are proud of the work we do in treatment. But it all points to one aim. Building community. We know that the best treatment in the world is ineffective without community. It just won’t work and struggling people will leave our doors hopeless and even worse, alone. It happens all the time at treatment centers all over the world.
Johann Hari wrote Chasing the Scream after embarking on a journey to learn what really heals addiction. His answer is unequivocal. Community. Another friend sent me his Ted Talk about what he learned on his three year, 30,000 mile journey to search out the root causes and solutions to addiction. If you or a loved one are struggling with addiction, I promise that watching this clip will be 15 minutes very well spent.
Finally, before you watch the video, notice what happened in this post. Two friends, victims of the pain of addiction, gave me something that helped keep me sober that day. Addiction really does hate community.